Summarily, we may say that the solution to the problems of all children, regardless of their situation, is the same solution that applies to the problems of grownups.

The answer lies in what I feel is one of the most promising breakthroughs in psychiatry in many years. In sensible, non-technical language Thomas A Harris explains how to gain control of yourself, your relationships and your future – no matter what happened in the past. Moses saw goodness supremely as justice, Plato essentially as wisdom, and Jesus centrally as love; yet they all agreed that virtue, however understood, was consistently undermined by something in human nature which was at war with something else. One of the reasons why I’m not a big fan of relying too much on models to describe reality is that people often end up stretching reality just to fit into their model. If the numbers I’m seeing are correct, Harris’ “copies sold” eclipsed Berne’s by nearly twice as much, with the paperbacks included.It has given hope to people who have become discouraged by the vagueness of many of the traditional types of psychotherapy. Everyone, at one point or another, feels so overwhelmed that they believe things will never get any easier. The psychoanalysts refer to this as transference – that is, the situation provokes a transfer of feelings and related behaviour from the past, when the patient was a child, into the present, in which the Child in the patient responds as it once did to the authority of the parent.

For example, Harris suggests signs that a person is in a Parent ego state can include the use of evaluative words that imply judgment based on an automatic, axiomatic and archaic value system: words like 'stupid, naughty, ridiculous, disgusting, should or ought' (though the latter can also be used in the Adult ego state). In the field of mathematics an answer to this dilemma was attempted in the development of the new mathematics, which has been taught in elementary schools throughout the country. This freedom grows from knowing the truth about what is in the Parent and what is in the Child and how this data feeds into present-day transactions. Certainly, the Adult in Burns’ book can be equated with the ‘higher self’ that forms the centerpiece of so much self-help and New Age writing.This readily understood standardisation, and the association Harris develops between TA and Penfield's neuroscience, gives TA a degree of credibility not possessed by earlier abstract models such as that developed by Freud [ citation needed]. This section of I'm OK, You're OK concludes as Harris describes when TA can be relevant to an individual's life, and how and by whom it might be delivered. As a book that helped me better understand the world, myself and actively helped shed some parental baggage and improve, well… I aam a bit of cheerleader. You have landed in the place to discuss great (and a few clunker) books, self-help tools (from prayer to meditation… psychology to magic… and everything in-between!

Humans create a picture in their heads of themselves, of others and of the world as a whole at a very young age. Space belongs to the astronauts, understanding human behavior belongs to the psychologists and psychiatrists, legislation belongs to the congressmen, and whether or not we should have a baby belongs to the theologians. When we have no idea about our inner Adult, Child, and Parent, the result is a “contaminated adult” and we often resort to substandard behavior that does nothing good for us and for the people around. Using the revolutionary psychological and psychiatric procedures of Transactional Analysis, this book will inspire and empower all its readers. Albeit transaction analysis should be all about games, it’s simplistic in its approach that “I’m OK, You’re OK” people don’t play games.In 1973, the book continued to sell well, and ultimately remained on the Best Seller List for exactly 70 weeks. It is realistic in that it confronts the patient with the fact that he is responsible for what happens in the future no matter what has happened in the past. When we blame and find fault, we replay the early blaming and fault-finding which is recorded in the Parent, and this makes us feel ok, because the Parent is ok, and we are coming on Parent.